An ode to my family

I have a big family. For that matter, my family is huge, and we are very Punjabi... And for the same matter, I have somehow become acclimatised to enjoying almost all things big and Punjabi. Although I do enjoy things big and not Punjabi, but hell, thats a different story altogether...

So being this big and Punjabi family, we love to celebrate, and in this nuclear-family world, we need just another reason to get together. So this was the havan that happened today... The sorts without a sacred fire and all the 'ahutis' and all the heat, this was the 'sunder kand ka paath'... Being a loud Punjabi myself, I totally love these occasions... There is the whole family, everyone chattering with someone; and looking for someone else to chatter with at the same time! I chatter a lot, and then when i am beginning to get bored, I take pictures!



The most wonderful thing I love about my family is what they say when they meet me... for the same of convenience and anonymity, I divide my whole family into three generations:

The Oldies
The Matures
The Kids


Lets start with the oldies. This is like the Raj Kumar generation - high on ideals and idol worship. The people who have been there, done it all... These are the grandmoms and the granddads of the family, and they have spent their entire lives being loud and Punjabi, and hence these days they spend their time being pious... So the first thing you tend to do when you meet up with them is to bow down and touch their feet. and you get blessings. And these can be real varied... Here is a sample...
"Oh you are leaving... come back quick, and we will find you a very pretty girl" Okay, but well, what for?
"Oh my god... you are leaving. We stay 300 kms from the place, but do drop in... you will get free food at our place..." yeah, and you will have to give counselling sessions to our children
"Oh, we have a place in Ahd. why dont you shift there. We wont charge you a thing..."


A typical conversation:

Auntie: Son, why dont you get married before leaving... there is this very pretty girl... (to mom) you remember mrs. Malhotra - her daughter. She is 22 and very pretty.
Mom: (respectfully) right
Auntie: You know... she has done her MBA... from xyz college... they carry out such big full page advertisements... she earns 20,000 per month... works in some computer company...
Mom: (somewhat irritated) right...
Auntie: In case you are interested, we can try and match up the kundalis... but im sure they will match... so beta, where do you think will be appropriate for the honeymoon? how many kids? will you go in for family planning? or let nature take its course? will you let her work? what do you expect in the dowry?

By this time mom and I are over the edge, and we just walk away... I am certain she would be sending a pic and the portfolio of the girl in a few days...


So the good wishes keep on coming, and you really exercise your tummy bowing down and getting back up all the day... you bow when you meet them. You bow when you they leave, and you bow some more when you receive the good wishes...



I do believe that all the grandmoms should open a dating consultancy... They know all the pretty women in the world. It would be a great help to a lot of poor souls in this world... The granddads are really nice. they are serene, relaxed and always want to play cards.



Then there is the second layer... This is where my mom and dad fit in... And looking at this generation, you realize why India is the most populated country. Their parents totally ignored family planning. so there are 4 childen to each pair of grandparents on an average... Somewhere aroung 20 members in the generation - not to mention their spouses. The best things about this generation are common to most of the members:
These guys are the loudest and carry the 'loud Punjabi" tradition very well
These guys take the maximum amount of volume
These guys crack the maximum (and the worst possible) jokes
These guys are the most concerned about everything... from the color of the shirt to the size of the vest!
These guys are also really confused between being overtly pious or otherwise...
These guys cook awesome food!

And lastly, there is my generation. Everyone congratulates you, everyone looks upto you... these are the kind of people foy think are from the same earth as you...

I just love my family!!!